Now I mentioned already the ridicules things dad and Debbie have been doing lately to me to piss me off to no end. Let me expand on it with my thanksgiving stories.
Let’s roll back two years or so to the first thanksgiving I can remember after I went to college. Now I couldn’t stand this event because I was constantly ignored and talked over. Now, I tend to tell stories when I talk, but when I’m interrupted after three words after supposedly having the attention of the family it makes me totally wonder if they have ADD or just don’t care what I have to say. I eventually was just like “screw it” and left without saying any goodbyes while everyone was far too involved with karaoke. Eventually (about twenty minutes later) my phone rings and it’s my dad. I tell him to stop ignoring me then hang up. Wasn’t going to deal with that.
One year ago I had the brilliant idea of maybe we should play a game where everyone picks a song from a list and the rest of the group have to guess who picked what song. Worked out well, but the catch was I made everyone play their song on Guitar Hero III afterwards. Massive hilarity went off as absolutely no one except for I think Nicky’s boyfriend at the time could pass the cannot fail threshold. (For the unenlightened, turn the game on easy, play a song and totally screw it up in the beginning. Your crowd meter will not decrease until you pass a certain time.) While that was fun that’s about all we really got to do. I thought about it again this year, but never got to that point.
See, because of the strife between my family and I I was never invited to thanksgiving. I figure whatever, what’s the point of driving an hour, seeing people I’m very “meh” for lately and eating. Frankly, the idea of food is moot since it’s cheaper for me to stay home and eat what’s around than get in the car and spend the cash driving. But what really ticks me off is Debbie sent me this statement this morning: “We had a toast for you and said a prayer for you” Now why in fuck do I not believe that statement for any fraction of time? Oh that’s right. She’s an asshole to me. I said screw that and promptly threw the message out.
But I did actually see some family yesterday. Yesterday morning Stephanie (who is only distantly related to me, she is the Niece of Debbie) was rolling through town on her way back to Michigan so we got together and had breakfast at Denny’s. We had pleasant conversation and I learned about what she did for a living. Was kind of short but it was good to catch up while we could. I still think that Denny’s undercooks all their eggs though. Even slicing the whites causes them to bleed all over.
Before I got too far I had to go see the Department of Social Services that day too. Tell me, why is black Friday a state holiday and everything is closed for them? Gee.
Later that afternoon Johnny came by and we went to a pizza joint somewhere on the hill. Hell, I passed by his old dorm on the way to it. The problem we had though is while he loved the place, he didn’t foresee that there would be a basketball game that night too. Hell. Either way, we got some food, sat in the car and had conversation. I poured my feelings and he gave me a little encouragement, but even now I still feel like a wreck. My brother and I get along very well for our own reasons. I guess it’s because money has never gotten between us.
Unrelated, I guess I could say something about another girl I know from high school. Not the one from two entries ago, but a different one. I was talking to her about thanksgiving and how I wasn’t invited home and she was like “I’m sorry” and stuff. While I think she apologizes for a little too much stuff that’s not in her control, I get the feeling she was sincere about this one. Then she said something that made me twitch. Not because it made me mad at her (it didn’t) but it gave me some rationale for something he said. “Maybe he doesn’t hate you but instead is ashamed” Makes me think like she could be on to something. Hey, my dad is the worst kind of Christian. Well…maybe not the worst, he does somewhat accept evolution and big bang, but at times I think he does hate me for being the most vocal Atheist among all of the children (which I know in my bloodline are all Atheists). I am nothing short of a scientist in my own right where he is an indoctrinator. He teaches religious education at a church of his to boot.
And people wonder why I am Zero Serenity of my own lineage, not of another’s.