Ladies. Gentlemen. Comrades. Today is a sad day. After months and months of fighting hard, I decided itâ€™s time. First, let us see our old friend:
She was a 1991 Oldsmobile Cutlass Calais that I had received as a gift from someone long gone. She was a good little car, got me where I needed to go, never complained about what I did to her and only decided she really had enough once. With only a few cosmetic kinks of old age, I thought she would be great for me.
With the countless hours we spent together, money I spent feeding her, keeping her healthy and upgrading her sound system, I had noticed she was coming apart at the seams.
I had decided that she needed to be checked out by a professional. I brought her into the doctor who said that fixing her would be more than sheâ€™s really worth. I had asked him to show me the damages and she was unconscious. I couldnâ€™t help but cry for her.
First, she became argumentative and wanted to make sure she was heard to me over the music. I couldnâ€™t understand what she wanted or why she did it until I noticed her primary vocal system was damaged. I didnâ€™t know what to do.
Later I found out she was having affairs with other people. I took this one to heart to know that she would open up to anyone.
She had been growing tired and weary and no longer being as resilient as she once was. I took a look under her hatch and decided that she would be better off in the afterlife. I took her to Vince who was an expert in handling old friends. He put her up on the scale, gave me a quote and handed me the cost to transport her. I said my final goodbye to her as she looked up and gazed, â€œIs this how it ends?â€ I replied with yes as I removed the last branding of mine from her, a sticker saying â€œGot anime?â€ I took one last look at her odometer and the metal under her hatch and thought â€œShe was so old but so unused, why did you have to goâ€¦â€
I hopped into my friendâ€™s car and said â€œDrive away quickly. I donâ€™t want it to linger.â€ In the time that passed, I couldnâ€™t help but think to the future. A future filled with possibilities. A future filled with new friends. A future with a new companion. So let us pay our final respects to her.
Weary myself, I had my friends drop me off at Rodgerâ€™s, who lead me to a man name Samuel. He said â€œDonâ€™t worry, I have just the friend for you.â€ And there she was. Pristine, new, shiny and roaring with the kind of words I like to hear. I said, â€œI will have her.â€ Samuel looked at me and said, â€œHere are some things, thank you and enjoy.â€ I took one grip of the wheel, one touch of the shifter, one press of the pedals. I knew she would treat me right. I smiled and said, â€œLetâ€™s go home,
2009 Mitsubishi Lancer GTS with 650W stereo, 30GBs music server, in-dash navigation system and 168 horses of pure power.â€
Hope you enjoyed this one.